That’s actually not a terrible entry to thirst after. I mean, you could technically count it as necrophilia, but its consensual necrophilia, so you do you.
What the fuck
Of all the reblogs and additions to this post, this is the one you’re shocked by?
Consensual necrophilia is not a phrase I thought I’d hear. Then again this is tumblr, so maybe that’s on me
Hot take: the term consensual necrophilia also applies to vampires, since they’re undead creatures. Wanna fuck Strahd? You’re in the same boat with the lich fuckers.
However, what I think the real treasure we’re all sleeping on is liches….in love. Just immortal wizard gals being pals.
I am absolutely here for the immortal undead lesbians
IS IT STILL NECROPHILIA IF YOU’RE DEAD TOO??
I don’t think so?
Ok next topic is a dragon and a human beastiality for the dragon?
both are sentient, so its just interspecies sex.
…I am now reminded of that argument I got into about whether or not a half-dragon would have a cloaca.
This post is an entire dungeon of bad decisions at this point
I think you mean legendary decisions
Legendary for being bad
This is not what i expected when i started this blog
To be fair, i wasnt expecting a whole lot when i started this blog in 2014
But it definitely didnt include 10k notes of thirsty monsterfuckers
11 approaching 12 thousand
Fuck you’re right
ok but can we just talk about abberations cuz like they’re intelligent and adults but their minds are inscrutable to humans. so like does that mean you can consent to sex with them? cuz you’re on wayyyy different levels of intelligence? but also they’re an adult with the capacity to give and understand consent? but could a normal sentient’s mind comprehend consenting to sex with them? help me out here i’m confused.
If both parties are sentient, its just interspecies sex, stop trying to overcomplicate things. Just because one species is better at calculus does not complicate the less intelligent species’ capacity for consent.
true but in most fiction an abberation’s mind functions in a completely different way from a non-abberation. essentially what i meant to point out was the potential issue of blue and orange morality
Are you seriously trying to start a philosophical debate on this post?
Like, I admire the chutzpah, dude, but it doesn’t matter if one species has a totally alien concept of everything. If both parties know what they want, communicate what they want, and agree with each other on it, its fully informed consent on each side and therefore just regular interspecies sex. Sentience is sentience, even if the way it manifests is wildly different.
honestly? i was drunk out of my mind both times i saw this post. also you make a very good point and are correct that flavors of sentience aside, as long as both parties are sentient and consent it’s fine. i apologize for drunk me’s ramblings.
… you get philosophically argumentative when you’re drunk? Thats a mood, my friend
what even is this post
Not sure. I lost it somewhere and I’m not sure where. Did it change from one subject to another or is it just me not understanding?
D&D logic & arguments
this post is a disaster and a tragedy and the essence of both D&D and Tumblr, what do y’all want from me
…wooooow
This post is truly a journey and yet if we look back to the innocent times of that original post we must all find ourselves reflecting: what did OP expect was going to happen?
Honestly? I didn’t really have any expectations. I figured, “hey, my DM said something stupid and funny, perfect, I’ll put it on the blog with the rest of the stupid and funny things people say in my D&D games,” and figured that would be that.
That being said, this is the Dungeon of Bad Decisions. As in, there are no good choices made here.
Also my IRL dump stat was probably Wisdom. I definitely have at least a -2 to Perception and Insight, I can tell you that. Forethought is not ny specialty.
Okay but this does raise the question of hyper-inteligent races with incredibly long lifespans. For instance, if a horny bard was trying to screw a god, from the bard’s perspective they’re both mature adults. However, by the standards of the god who has lived for millions of years and has a mind the size of a galaxy, the bard may be just a child. So, assuming the god consents, what would the implications of that be?
Now if you excuse me I need to go bleach my brain and stop thinking about this.
Would they be a child, though? I mean, sure by the standards of the god’s species, they might be – look at this little bard who can’t even bend the cosmos to their whim! (or however “adulthood” is measured with this type of deity) – but the bard is NOT a member of the god’s species. presumably if they’re that smart, they understand that
I would assume that if the bard is considered an adult by the standards of their own species, – eg, physical sexual maturity, psychological maturity, can understand any of the consequences and risks involved (magical/celestial STIs, pregnancy, any dangers inherent to transdimensional extraplanar sex, is there telepathy stuff going on with this god?, possible emotional risks, etc), etc – then it’s fine.
To put it a different way (because I’m less familiar with DnD elves and how their aging works), Tolkien elves don’t reach adulthood until age 100. You wouldn’t have sex with a 25 year old elf – they’d be a little kid, even though having sex with a consenting 25 year old human is fine. But an adult human and an adult elf – by the standards of their own species – can both give meaningful consent to sex/marriage. (I mean, look, Luthien’s dad fucked an angel.)
I think it’d be good to talk about it first, but that’s just a good policy in general with sex and boundaries.
Many good points, thank you!
I haven’t read this whole thing yet but I saw ‘consensual necrophilia’ twice and the fact that this ends with ‘many good points, thank you!’ fills me with an emotion only tumblr causes.
My feelings are summed up by:
Reminder: Lady Dimitrescue is a vampire and people have been thirsting up and down the internet for her
All of you have a home in the consensual necrophilia pit
Consensual necrophilia is the gateway kink to straight up monsterfucking
Goddamn this is still going on?
It is now!
this keeps getting more cursed every time i see if on my feed
Good! Suffer with me!
Tumblr was a mistake.
How has this managed to not even glance at slimes yet…
Pretty sure we covered molds and slimes fairly early on. Conclusion: they don’t pass the Harkness Test (can’t even communicate at all) so don’t fuck them.
But can they be used as lube then?
This makes me incredibly uncomfortable but I think they can. Like how plants are used for medicine or something.
Yeah, but plants are dead and processed in some fashion, generally speaking.
Also, all the slimes in DnD cause some kind of damage on physical contact, and I don’t see why that would stop after they’ve died. Using slime remains as lube is just going to hurt. A lot. Which rather defeats the purpose of usingn lube in the first place, I think.
Maybe they’d be more suited toward those endurance based lubes that numb your places a little. Numbing sensations are technically some level of pain response right?
Absolutely not. Do not do this.
Unless you’re talking about those gels and serums and creams for making the penis less sensitive? Because that’s a very different thing than a lubricant.
Also, I don’t think there are any oozes or slimes in the Monster Manual that do numbing damage. I think it’s mostly acid or necrotic or what-have-you.
Writer: I know not everyone grew up dealing with a pool but listen, there’s such a thing as a PH test. It’s all acids and shit. Just find where that slime, dead or not, falls on the PH scale and chuck the right stuff in it until its not harmful anymore. Hell if you do that to a living one, you could take the opportunity to tame it and teach it tricks. The morality of teaching it the trick “Lube” aside, the only thing holding you back is a little chemistry.
I don’t know what slimes have that passes for biology, but I’d guess that altering it’s PH balance probably isn’t healthy for it.
Can’t decide whether I’m glad or not this conversation didn’t happen the first year of this post’s existence.
As soon as I read plants i thought of aloe vera for some reason
Interesting choice. Possibly painful, considering the spines, but on the other hand, thick and soft.
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