thedungeonofbaddecisions:

thelistofmyfandomsfillsatardis:

thedungeonofbaddecisions:

This one needs backstory.

My Bard/Paladin had just died and been replaced by a battlemaster Fighter, so needless to say, I was a little tired of the bullcrap coming from the other characters. We were gearing up to assassinate the leader of a gladiatorial arena at his wedding, so everyone was getting all fancied up, and the rogue, who is played by a rather tomboyish girl, was putting up a fuss about being uncomfortable in the dress she had bought. Everyone was being noisy and ridiculous.

I was tired both in real life and in game, so, in the dining hall of the tavern we were in, took the dress from her, had my (very manly man) archer strip down and put on the dress.

Needless to say, everyone lost their crap, and the monk cast silence.

I drew out my Crossbow of Whispers, a magical item that allows me to cast message on the target of any attack I make that hits, and fired at the rogue. Nobody except for her was able to hear when I said, “And I look better in it than you ever will.”

And stalked out of the tavern like a diva.

I am sassy (I submitted this one)