A Non-Comprehensive List of Birds That Piss Me Off
1. Dracula Parrot. This thing pisses me off like, a bunch
2.
King Vulture. the felted craft project equivalent of a haunted ventriloquist dummy
i will never not resent this bird
3. Jacana Bird. This is the most unnecessary cursed nonsense. i deserve an apology for having to look at this. I can feel its fingers stroking my ears
No it does not have SIX FREAKING LIMBS. it’s carrying its stupid creepy spawn under its wings. A+ parents but still, piss off. even the normal 2 legged version isn’t much better
put those AWAY.
4. The Shoebill, which i’m sure we’re all sick of hearing about. this thing is the epitome of a crappy photorealistic cgi disney villainy. i despise this bird.
also this is what they look like standing up. i just feel like i shouldn’t have to deal with that, i really do.
5. Inca Tern. truly, hipsters ruin everything
6. Tragopan. it looks like a star wars species, which i dislike on principle
7. The Secretary Bird. it wears yoga pants.
also i’m uncomfortable with the length of its eyelashes
8. finally, i really dislike this one specific parakeet
in conclusion, these birds exist to haunt me and this knowledge is a burden. birds exist to observe our sin; always watching, they are filled with malice. flee from them
the most wreched thin on this list is your attitude and I will defend these ugly ass bird’s honor so meet me behind the quiznos
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