zalrb:

So, imagine you’re a kid, right, and you’re bullied by a group of other kids who then steal your bike

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but that’s OK because you find a pretty interesting looking game not realizing that it’s actually beckoning to you so it can start some shit and that years before these two dudes buried it because they were like, this shit is evil.

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Then you have a dad who kind of neglects you and then tells you he’s sending you off to boarding school and then leaves you for the night because he has more important things to deal with than you

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so then you plan to runaway but then your friend comes over to give you back the bike the bullies stole from you so you’re like hey, we should play this harmless game that I found because it’ll be super fun!

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But then guess what happens, you get sucked INTO the game because “in the jungle, you must wait”:

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Then years later these kids, whose parents have died in a car crash by
the way — and one of them deals with the trauma of that by lying about
how they died to every stranger who asks her about it, find this game,
play it and you come out of the game after spending twenty-some-odd years ALONE in a
supernatural jungle designed to torment you but you’re still mentally 12 even though you’ve grown up and you still think it’s the night you disappeared

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Now switch gears and imagine being a kid who watches her friend being sucked into a game and then is chased out of the house by bats

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And no one believes you when you explain that your friend is gone because he was sucked into a game so then you have to go to therapy to convince yourself that what you saw was impossible because it technically is impossible and you even change your name because you don’t want to be associated with ANYTHING about that night because it was the night you saw your friend get sucked into a GAME but then he comes back twenty years later and asks you to continue playing that game and you legitimately think you’re having a psychotic episode because people don’t get sucked into games, that’s INSANE:

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now you’re the person who was stuck in a supernatural jungle for twenty years and when you get out of the game, you find out your dick dad lost his entire fortune trying to find you and then you get a little mad because your friend didn’t try to continue to play the game to get you out of the jungle and kind of left you to rot but then be that friend who’s like, I don’t think you understand what it was like for me after I saw you get sucked into a boardgame? Everyone thought I was losing my mind, they convinced me what I saw wasn’t real and I’m not going to play this game again because it triggers some shit but then you’re tricked into playing by the friend who you accidentally abandoned in a supernatural forest designed to kill him.

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Then you have the game itself, it’s destructive and it turns a child into a monkey

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and it manifests your biggest fear — your dad — into a man who is literally trying to murder you

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liiiiiiiike I dunno, that shit is dark.

God the new ones missed the point so bad…