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airyairyquitecontrary:

moonslept:

thorin no

In the course of a discussion with morbidyetdelightful the other day, I ended up headcanoning what all the dwarves are like to hug.

Thorin: epic, obviously, but rather nerve-wracking due to his tendency to yell at you intimidatingly just beforehand. That is probably the hilt of Orcrist poking you in the tummy. Don’t dwell on it.

Fili and Kili: SANDWICH HUGS EXTRAORDINAIRE.

Balin: Soft and cosy, with a surprising crinkling sound when you press against him and make contact with all the Werther’s Originals in his pockets. A shoulder-patter.

Dwalin: Initially hesitant, because he doesn’t want to crush you, but once he calibrates for the strength of your spine and ribcage, warm, firm and reassuring. See if you can get your head tucked in under his chin.

Oin: Does not understand you are asking for hugs. Shouts at you loudly and deafly for hitting him up for drugs. Just because he is the apothecary doesn’t mean he’s some kind of dealer.

Gloin: Gruff, brisk and beard-intensive. You may get tangled and have to be cut free.

Bifur: Very gentle and soothing; a hair-stroker. May get lost in thought and forget to disengage; will not be offended if you step back after a few minutes and move away.

Bofur: Warm, whiskery and bracing; widely considered the best spooner in the Company.

Bombur: Has some difficulty in hugging people frontally because of the swell of his belly versus the length of his arms, but the nifty thing is he can drop the loop of his beard over your head so it’s like his hair is giving you a hug too. Favours the one-armed side-hug.

Dori: In a domestic setting, Dori is difficult to hug because he’s always busy doing something for the comfort of others. You will probably need to dart in and hug him while he holds his Marigolded hands aloft trying not to drip on you. In all events, a very satisfying, slightly squashy hug, reminiscent of your childhood teddy-bear.

Nori: Wandering hands, but firm and warm. 

Ori: Your personal koala.

Daw, c’mon Thorin!